103. Ego Tripping

"Life will give you whatever experience is most helpful for the evolution of your consciousness. How do you know this is the experience you need? Because this is the experience you are having at this moment." - Eckhart Tolle, A New Earth

Have you ever been in the middle of a conversation and you realize that you've started behaving badly by talking a little too loudly and your heart is beating fast and you've sort-of stopped listening altogether and you are spending the moments when you're not speaking thinking about what you're about to say to defend your position?

Me = Today

This is what I experience as...ego tripping. Allowing my ego to take over my conscious mind means that I end up saying and doing things that later (when I wake up from this ego-induced body-snatching and get back into a place of rational and loving consciousness) I regret and end up having so say things like "I'm sorry" and "I don't know what I was thinking" or "How thoughtless of me!"

Ego. Regret. Guilt...Oh, my!!!

I've been trying to become more aware of my ego speaking in my head (as it will inevitably) and knowing that I don't have to LISTEN to silly ego advice and I certainly don't have to ACT like the a$$hole it would prefer me to act like. I imagine I am successful at this about 2% of the time, but that's better than nothing, I suppose.

Besides...self-condemnation for allowing the ego to take control is just more ego tripping.

Ha!

Confusing? Yes!

Anyhoo, here's a fun quote that I've found to be hugely helpful in disempowering my ego-mind (which I do not have to identify with, by the way...since it's just a manifestation of the collective insanity that is the human psyche...still...I have separation anxiety.)

"The ego isn't wrong; it's just unconscious. When you observe the ego in yourself, you are beginning to go beyond it. Don't take the ego too seriously. When you detect egoic behavior in yourself, smile. At times you may even laugh...Above all, know that the ego isn't personal. It isn't who you are. If you consider the ego to be your personal problem, that's just more ego." - Eckhart Tolle, A New Earth

Oh, Ego...What would I be without you?...But seriously, Ego, would you just shut-up sometimes...because you are soooo not helpful.

Loves,
V

"To recognize one's own insanity is, of course, the arising of sanity, the beginning of healing and transcendence." - Eckhart Tolle, A New Earth