44. Looking For A Good Time? Do Dishes.

"The feeling of being hurried is not usually the result of living a full life and having no time. It is, on the contrary, born of a vague fear that we are wasting our life. When we do not do the one thing we ought to do, we have no time for anything else - we are the busiest people in the world." - Eric Hoffer, philosopher & author (1902-1983)

Hey, Peeps!

I know you all have busy, busy lives. That’s the way of the world these days, right?

I often forget that I need to give myself space to actually ENJOY my life. Every time I check something off the to-do list, it just seems to get longer.

In the interest of regaining some of my sanity, I am going to be mindful to single-task today. I will do one thing at a time and enjoy focusing on doing that one thing really, really well.

What will you do today to be more mindful and experience a deeper sense of joy? Don’t know? Need inspiration?

Here’s a gift for you! … A guest post from my FAVORITE blog: ZenHabits. See below…

Love,

V

The Mindfulness Guide for the Super Busy: How to Live Life to the Fullest 

Post written by Leo Babauta. Follow me on Twitter.

 

“Smile, breathe and go slowly.” - Thich Nhat Hanh, Zen Buddhist monk

The idea of being mindful — being present, being more conscious of life as it happens — seems a bit impossible to many of the super busy.

But not only is it possible, I’d submit that it’s desirable, and that it’ll help the busy (and non-busy) achieve their goals and enjoy life more fully…

 “Do you have patience to wait till your mud settles and the water is clear? Can you remain unmoving till the right action arises by itself?” - Lao Tzu

How to Be Mindful

1. Do one thing at a time. Single-task, don’t multi-task. When you’re pouring water, just pour water. When you’re eating, just eat. When you’re bathing, just bathe. Don’t try to knock off a few tasks while eating or bathing or driving. Zen proverb: “When walking, walk. When eating, eat.”

2. Do it slowly and deliberately. You can do one task at a time, but also rush that task. Instead, take your time, and move slowly. Make your actions deliberate, not rushed and random. It takes practice, but it helps you focus on the task.

3. Do less. If you do less, you can do those things more slowly, more completely and with more concentration. If you fill your day with tasks, you will be rushing from one thing to the next without stopping to think about what you do. But you’re busy and you can’t possibly do less, right? You can. I’ve done it, and so have many busy people. It’s a matter of figuring out what’s important, and letting go of what’s not. Read more: The Lazy Manifesto: Do Less.

4. Put space between things. Related to the “Do less” rule, but it’s a way of managing your schedule so that you always have time to complete each task. Don’t schedule things close together — instead, leave room between things on your schedule. That gives you a more relaxed schedule, and leaves space in case one task takes longer than you planned.

5. Spend at least 5 minutes each day doing nothing. Just sit in silence. Become aware of your thoughts. Focus on your breathing. Notice the world around you. Become comfortable with the silence and stillness. It’ll do you a world of good — and just takes 5 minutes!

6. Stop worrying about the future – focus on the present. Become more aware of your thinking — are you constantly worrying about the future? Learn to recognize when you’re doing this, and then practice bringing yourself back to the present. Just focus on what you’re doing, right now. Enjoy the present moment.

7. When you’re talking to someone, be present. How many of us have spent time with someone but have been thinking about what we need to do in the future? Or thinking about what we want to say next, instead of really listening to that person? Instead, focus on being present, on really listening, on really enjoying your time with that person.

8. Eat slowly and savor your food. Food can be crammed down our throats in a rush, but where’s the joy in that? Savor each bite, slowly, and really get the most out of your food. Interestingly, you’ll eat less this way, and digest your food better as well.

9. Live slowly and savor your life. Just as you would savor your food by eating it more slowly, do everything this way — slow down and savor each and every moment. As I type this, for example, I have my 3-year-old daughter, Noelle, on my lap. She’s just sitting here quietly, as the rain pours down in a hush outside. What a lovely moment. In fact, I’m going to take a few minutes off just to be with her now. Be right back. :)

10. Make cleaning and cooking become meditation. Cooking and cleaning are often seen as drudgery, but actually they are both great ways to practice mindfulness, and can be great rituals performed each day. If cooking and cleaning seem like boring chores to you, try doing them as a form of meditation. Put your entire mind into those tasks, concentrate, and do them slowly and completely. It could change your entire day (as well as leave you with a cleaner house).

11. Keep practicing. When you get frustrated, just take a deep breath. When you ask yourself, “What should I do now, Self?”, the answer is “keep practicing”.

“When you drive around the city and come to a red light or a stop sign, you can just sit back and make use of these twenty or thirty seconds to relax — to breathe in, breathe out, and enjoy arriving in the present moment. There are many things like that we can do.” - Thich Nhat Hanh

I’ll leave you with a video from one of my favorite mindfulness teachers, Thich Nhat Hanh (check out his books, Peace Is Every Step: The Path of Mindfulness in Everyday Life, and True Love: A Practice for Awakening the Heart):

21. You Be The Judge… Or Not?

“Judgement kills creativity. Judgment kills the artist. For when we judge, we are doing more damage to ourselves than the person we are judging.” – Peter Pamela Rose, Actor’s Spiritual Toolbox

Don’t judge… Notice.

“Cut people slack… Their actions might not reveal their enduring character but instead reflect some situation they find themselves in. Forbearance is a form of generosity.” – Gretchen Rubin, The Happiness Project

When I judge, I find myself closed-off to the learning that’s there to be gained from a critical thought. So now I make an effort to notice rather than judge. When I notice something, I’m not immediately placing a value on it… good/bad… right/wrong. I try to let go of my ego and take it in and allow the information to permeate my brain, if it’s useful… I keep it… if it’s not useful… I forget it.

“The beginner scorns criticism. The wise soul carefully weighs it. And the Master says, “But, of course!” – Mike Dooley, Tut’s Universe

There’s something valuable to be learned from every experience and every situation,... good, bad, ugly, sexy, annoying, painful, awesome, amazing, etc.

“I have learnt silence from the talkative, toleration form the intolerant, and kindness from the unkind; yet strange, I am ungrateful to these teachers.” – Khalil Gibran, mystic, poet & artist (1883-1931)

But when fail to NOTICE and start to JUDGE myself or others it triggers a defense mechanism inside me, this fear of being judged myself… which closes me off to my source, my heart, my creativity. And accessing those things with a child-like spirit of play is the greatest joy in my life. So allowing judgment to kill that? Nope. F-that. I’d rather kill the judgment… or let it go… if a less violent way is preferred.

“If something is not working let it go. If something wants to work really well, let it into your life.” – Lena Stevens, The Power Path

Essentially, I don’t like the feeling of being judged, so I don’t like to inflict that kind of negativity on others. I don’t blindly close my eyes though, I do notice things, but my urge to JUDGE generally comes from my own fear of inadequacy or my ego’s defensive need to try to make myself feel superior and safe… None of which have any lasting value in the creative process.

So judgment? Bye-bye! Noticing… Hello!

“The real art of conversation is not only to say the right thing at the right place but to leave unsaid the wrong thing at the tempting moment.” – Dorothy Nevill

Some people think that being super judgmental makes them seem smarter. And maybe they do seem smarter… to other judgmental people. But do I want to create a new work of art with Mr. Judgy McJudgerson? Nope. That sounds like no fun at all… and I’d rather be creative than seem “smart.”

“Sometimes a man wants to be stupid if it lets him do a thing his cleverness forbids.” – John Steinbeck, novelist, Nobel laureate (1902-1968)

Besides it’s easy to destroy something, to tear it to shreds and point out all the flaws. But seeing the potential in things requires vision, creativity, specificity... and, dare I say, bravery... especially when your speaking-up in a crowd of fear-addicted McJudgersons, bless them.

“Giving positive reviews requires humility… A willingness to be pleased requires modesty and even innocence.” – Gretchen Rubin, The Happiness Project

So next time you feel the urge to judge… notice yourself judging… and choose for yourself.

To judge or not to judge? That is the question.

Imperfectly,

Virginia

“Ah, good taste, what a dreadful thing! Taste is the enemy of creativeness.” – Pablo Picasso